Bob and I talked about this day many times and I never expected when it finally came that I would have to do it alone.
Yesterday I took Logan to QAS to register him and it made me so sad seeing all the kids with both parents and he just had me. I know Bob looked forward to this day so much more than me because this is the school he went to and he couldn’t wait to show Logan everything. Logan has been in that school many times but it was when he was younger when Bob and I helped out with the youth group there so he didn’t remember much of it. I think it will be a great school for him in so many ways but also the fact that that’s where daddy went to school. Logan seems pretty excited about that part. I’ve talked to Msgr. many times about sending the kids there and he’s been so helpful in making sure it happens.
While filling out the paper work yesterday I had to keep myself from crying in front of all these other parents and kids. I get to marital status and wrote in widowed, get to father’s information and put Bob’s name and then deceased and finally get to the end where it has separate places for each parents signature and father’s signature is just left blank. These things most people don’t think twice about and I sit there just staring at all the blank space that should be filled in with Bob’s information.
Today I started filling out the scholarship information online and again just had to leave spaces blank. I had a few questions about some of the things they needed so had to make a phone call. The lady I spoke with was really nice and helpful which was great because I could barely get out what I was trying to say because I just started crying on the phone. I was seriously completely fine when I called and then when I said that Bob had passed I just lost it. It’s amazing how you can go days or sometimes even weeks being somewhat “normal” and then just break down sometimes even with the smallest things. I finally got everything filled out and taken care of though so that’s a good thing. I can’t believe I have an almost Kindergartener and I know when that day comes I’m going to be a complete mess.