Police Widows

I am friends with quite a few widows and widowers on Facebook and a few of the ladies happen to be widows of police officers. Some have died in the line of duty and others like my husband Bob who weren’t line of duty deaths.

I am so sick of seeing the judging that widows and widowers get. We can’t do anything right it seems because everyone has their opinions and it’s even worse for the women who are in the spotlight because of a line of duty death.

You’re dating? That’s too soon.
Why aren’t you dating yet? I think you should get back out there.

You moved out of your home? Why would you do that?
You stayed in your home? I don’t think I could do that.

You’re going out and enjoying life? You should lock yourself in a room and cry.

No matter what we do it is never going to be the right thing for many people. But guess what? We are able to make those decisions for ourselves and figure things out for this new life we are trying to navigate that none of us asked for or wanted.

The other day I had the privilege of getting together with my police wife friends. Yes, I’m still a police wife! Just because Bob passed doesn’t change that. We get together at least once a month and have such an amazing time. We get each other in a way that others don’t. Even though Elizabeth and I are the only ones in our group who have lost our husbands they are still there for us no matter what. Elizabeth and I do share a special bond though and unfortunately only widows and widowers truly understand that. She changed her profile picture the other day to one of her and I from our night out at professional bull riding and said “I love the bond we have!”. I truly do love the bond her and I have and am so glad we can be there for each other. You see the photo and see two women smiling and having a great time. What you don’t see is how broken we are on the inside. You don’t see that before this picture some guy said “don’t I know you, where do I know you from?” and all of us just not saying anything because we don’t want her to be put on the spot like that. You don’t see that at the next stop of the night I broke down and started crying because of the song that someone was singing that reminded me of Bob. You just never know when grief is going to hit but it’s always going to be there for Elizabeth and I. We will never stop grieving for our husbands but we will continue to move forward and try to live our lives like they would want us to and be there for our amazing little boys so that they can grow up to be amazing men like their daddies were.

I couldn’t help but notice someone commented something horrible on that picture. I am seriously shocked at the amount of people out there that attack her for any reason but especially for trying to go out and enjoy herself and smile once in a while. I’m sorry but we’re not going to sit at home and curl up in a ball and cry ourselves to sleep every night. We know all too well how short life is and we want to enjoy it while we can. It’s exactly what Bob and Blake would want for us.

Elizabeth, you are doing amazing things for our police officers and Blake would be so proud of you. Don’t listen to the haters and continue to be there for our men and women in blue! We all love you!