Getting sick isn’t fun for anyone but as a solo parent who already has other diseases to deal with it really sucks. I’ve been up since 5 this morning sick. I honestly think it was from something I ate the night before rather than flu. The hardest part this morning was the fact that the boys woke up and were scared and started crying because mommy was sick. The last time they saw anyone like this was when Bob was sick so I’m sure it terrified them. I tried to calm them down but couldn’t really and couldn’t comfort them in any way. I just had to tell them I’d be fine and they needed to get out. I heard Logan tell Caleb, “get out Caleb, mommy is sick, do you want her to die like daddy and then we don’t have any family?!”. I was already in tears from being sick and then hearing that just broke me.
Luckily my mother in law was already going to be getting the boys to take them to a movie today so she came over a little earlier to get them ready and then she is keeping them until this evening. If she wasn’t available I’m not sure what I would have done, the smell of food made me sick and just walking around made me sick so there was no way I could have taken care of them today. She dropped off some medicine for me after they were done with the movie and so far it’s been helpful. I wasn’t even able to keep my water down so that was really scary. For those that don’t remember or haven’t read my blog, my Lupus attacked my kidneys so I’m always terrified of becoming dehydrated and doing more damage to them than is already done. I was finally able to eat a banana today so that’s progress.
Too many people take their spouse for granted and I hope those that read this really think about what they have. Stop fighting over stupid shit, stop getting frustrated because you don’t like the way they fold laundry, do other housework, dress your child or the fact that they have a job that makes them late for dinner or miss out on certain family things once in a while. Just be appreciative that they are alive and are there to help. I see it everyday on Facebook, especially in some of the mommy groups I’m in and it’s ridiculous how some of these women throw their men under the bus. I think it’s true that most people don’t appreciate what they have until it’s gone and I hope I can change your mind in some way before it’s too late.
I also want to give a huge thanks to my mother in law. She has been one of the biggest supporters/helpers for me since Bob died. I know Bob told her to be there for me and the kids but even if he didn’t she would be. I feel sad for so many of my widow/widower friends that don’t have that support and especially don’t have it from their late spouses side. I think it’s completely unfair to them and in most cases makes their life even harder. The death of their loved one shouldn’t change it, you’re still family.
Okay, enough of all that, back to sleep for a bit. I just had to get this off of my mind.